todaywasaFAIRYTALE

(Source: patriciaclare)

trybeinghappy:

Never enough.

the-sleep-lover:

how do you forget someone that gave you so much to remember? <3

the-sleep-lover:

Sad isn’t it? One minute your planning spending the rest of your lifes together at such a young age then BANG you break up.& then your wondering what happened & you cry & cry at the fact that you know things will never be the same </3

This one’s for my first love.

Yes, YOU DID RUINED ME, everything…my dreams,my hopes, my future.

If only you had a single idea how messed up my life has become because of you. But I won’t let that happen ever again. I won’t ever make you a part of my life. I HATE YOU!!! I do.

(Source: the-sleep-lover)

by the end of this i’d probably cried my heart out already. Writing about my own personal experience —the one which hurts the most — is probably the most excruciating thing on my part. But still i know that somehow this story…MY STORY…will in a way help someone out there who feels just the same as i am right now. I wish i’d be an inspiration to you…:)

what is LOVE?
marami nang nagtatanong…marami na ring sumubok na sumagot 
pero in the end sino ba talaga ang tama?


LOVE for me is simple. Love is the day i stared at him. the day i stared at his eyes and by then i said to myself that thing…THAT IS LOVE FOR ME.

well as you can see i am not the typical flirty girl you see around. I am one of those smart-single girl type when i was in highschool. LOVE?that was a joke to me. I was focused on my studies and my friends and having a boyfriend wasn’t on my plan at all. but you see highschool won’t be the same without that special someone. I was pressured in a way. Sino ba naman ang hindi???everyone was with their so-called “BABY, HONEYPIE, MHINE” or whatever they call it. ANd i was just right there in the corner watching all those love birds together…HOW SWEET!:)

i wasn’t jealous at all…let’s just say im sort of CURIOUS about the feeling. ano ba ang pakiramdam nang magboyfriend????is it just the same?parang friends lng ba? that kind of stuff was always on my mind. For a while i forgot about it. i moved on with my ordinary life. not until……….the day i stared at him.

He was sitting at the back of the room at that time…and well, honestly saying kahit maliit lng ang school namin i was really not that familiar with him. i was busy that day preparing for a program i think. I was covered with paint and i wasn’t really at the best look…:)

i turned around and looked at his classroom. I was mesmerized. I couldn’t help myself but stare at your eyes. Then he saw me staring at him. My eyes met his eyes. I couldn’t control the beating of my heart. It was just like i was having my asthma attack again. At that time i said to myself that “THIS BOY IS SPECIAL”. and indeed he was.

it wasn’t easy at first…i was a year older than him. I was the smart girl and he was the athletic dude. not basically a typical match right? but i guess love chooses no one. No matter how long the list of qualifications you have in the end you’ll end up with someone different…but MUCH BETTER than want you wanted and hoped for. I had a hard time trying to get his attention kasi you know it would be awkward to just tell him that i LIKE HIM. and i just don’t have the courage to do that. so a kept it my own little secret. 

everytime i pass his room i would never fail to look at the back because i know that is where he is sitting. Kahit one look lng ok na ako dun. I wans’t asking for something more. I was contented with that. But one time i’ve heard he had a girlfriend. Sobrang OUCH! as in OUCH! but my friends were there to comfort me so it wasn’t hard at that time. But there was this time when i just couldn’t help myself..i can’t control myself not to cry…i saw him with his girlfriend at the mall…and i was just right there staring blankly at the two of them…I was EMPTY. I was NUMB. I was in PAIN. then suddenly PAK! my friend slapped me..haha..they gave words of wisdom about love (1st year lng kme nun ha!) haha..:)
at that age i had my first broken heart. 

i forgot about the feeling..i forgot HIM. i tried so hard not to see him in school. As in sobrang nakakahiya ng mga ginawa ko just to avoid him. (LAUGHS!) but then you know the feeling when you love someone…you can’t run away from it. you can try but only for a while becasue at the end of the day that feeling will always be right there.

and no matter how much i avoided the fact remains…I AM IN LOVE WITH HIM.

“WALA NA SILA!” that was the first thing i heard early in the morning when i came to school. They broke up. i didn’t know what to say. I know i like him but there’s this evil thing in me that says “REVENGE”. 
My plan was to make him fall in love with me…and when he already loves me..i will break his heart and i will make him cry. EVIL NOH? but you know…i did make him fall in love with me…but the “revenge thing” wala nasunod sa plano…because at the end I WAS STILL COMPLETELY IN LOVE WITH HIM.

highschool life with him was the most happiest time. maybe i missed some parts of it for i wasn’t single but i never regretted it. I was happy. And i couldn’t ask for more. There were hard times but we stayed together. We made our dreams together. We laughed together. We cried together. He isn’t just a boyfriend to me. I FOUND MY BEST FRIEND IN HIM….:)

he was my SAVIOR. he was always there for me no matter what time of day. he was my EVERYTHING. He taught me a lot of things na sobra-sobrang kong pinapasalamatan. He gave almost 3 years of his life to me and i gave mine to him. But as you see it, life isn’t as simple as that. We have to live for ourselves, and if that means that we have to let go of each other for us to make it up for the time we’ve missed, WE HAVE TO. 

Like my teacher said: Similarities attracts two people together, DIFFERENCES is what keeps them together. ——No matter how much you love each other there will come a time that you will say to yourself “I WANT TIME FOR MYSELF”…i want time to fix myself first…and if someday we will meet again and you’re still there for me…THAT’S DESTINY. 

if there is one thing i’ve learned that is happy endings doesn’t necessarily come true. After 2years and 7 months here i am at the blank page of my life again. 

Oftentimes we say goodbye to the person we love without wanting to. Though that doesn’t mean that we’ve stopped loving them …or we’ve stopped to care. Sometimes goodbye is a painful way to say I LOVE YOU.

But how can i forget you when you are always on my mind?—————-
How can I not want you when your all i want inside?—————————-
How can I let you go when i can’t see us apart?————————————-
How can I not love you when you control my heart?——————————

Real tears are not those that fall from the eyes and cover the face…but those that fall from the heart and covers the soul.

Sometimes i wish i have never met you. because then i could go to bed at night not knowing there was someone like you out there. I don’t know where to start again. I don’t know how to live without the half of my heart…Maybe if i just have looked away that day i stared at you everything would be different and my heart wouldn’t be breaking right now.

I always thought that looking back on tears would make me laugh but i never knew that looking back on laughs would make me cry.

A million words wouldn’t bring you back.
i Know because I’ve tried.
Neither would a million tears.
I know because I’ve cried.

Everytime i remember about us…
it would always bring a smile into my lips and tears to my eye.

I WILL NEVER REGRET LOVING YOU.

they say never regret the past because at one point everything was what you wanted.
I cried when I knew i lost you, afraid i had lost it all.
Then i realized that losing you didn’t have to mean I LOST ME.

ONLY LOVE can BREAKA HEART; ONLY LOVE can MEND IT AGAIN.

im bringing with me your promise. I will hold it in my heart. I know i will meet you again.
I may not have you right now but i know i will always have you here in my heart.

You are my BEST FRIEND. MY ONE AND ONLY BEST FRIEND.

Dear You
I know now that I must let you go. Despite the hurt, the anger, the sadness, the confusion, the longing still there I can and will let this love go. I have no regrets. I loved you with everything inside of me. You and I are now just friends. We can’t go back to the past versions of ourselves and change things. We grew up, we changed, we moved away, we live different lives.
I wanted the person beside me to be you. I wanted to walk through life with you. That will never happen. You’ll never be the guy for me. Deep down inside of me I didn’t want to give up on you, to give up on this love I have for you. Sometimes we have to give up, we have to let go, so that life can give us something even better, even more right for us. I wanted to believe if I waited, if I was patient I’d find that you loved me back. The truth is for you I’m an option not a priority.
I won’t doubt this love. I won’t regret it. I won’t hold onto it. You are on your own journey and I am on mine so let’s leave it at that. Let’s go our separate ways and wish each other luck and happiness. Let’s live well, and believe that the other is enjoying their life. The boy I fell in love with is becoming his own person, and the girl who fell in love with you is becoming her own woman. I’m proud of us. I’m proud of me for finally opening my heart and even now not closing it back up. I’m proud of myself for facing love with courage and heartache with the same. I’m proud of myself for trying, for being honest with you and me, for being sincere and genuine.
I’m not perfect. You are not perfect. We are flawed beings. I loved you for all of that, for your good and bad.You taught me about love, and about heartbreak. I now know both. What it feels like to want to put someone else first. To want to make someone happy. I know what it feels like to carry another person inside of you. I know what it feels like to be hurt and sad because of the person you love. To have your insides screaming in misery over them. I know the bittersweet taste of love because of you. Thank you for showing be I am capable of love, and I can overcome heartbreak. Next time, whenever that happens I’ll be even braver, even stronger, even more honest and sincere. I’ll trust that if two people are meant to be in each other’s lives life will give them opportunities to do so.
It’s crazy how we fall in love with people we’ll never end up with. We fall in love more than once, and if we are lucky one of them will last long enough for us to understand what it means to be loved by another person. To build a life with them. To have someone at your side, who’ll be there for a long time to come. I want that, someone who will be there. Who will understand and accept me. Who gets the things no one else does. I deserve that. I am worthy of that. That is why, I’m going to say goodbye to this love I have for you. I’m going to say goodbye to the boy I fell in love with.I’m going to say goodbye to what we once were. To let go of the past and the memories we shared. I won’t forget them, but I won’t put them on a pedestal. I don’t know who I am to you, but I won’t let you become anything more to me.
If we talk we talk. If we become friends again, we become friends again. But I won’t be the one to light that candle. I won’t hold my breath either. I’m going to live my life, love. I’m going to be happy. I’m going to enjoy it. I’m going to be proud of myself, and find someone who will notice that. Someone who isn’t you. This chapter of you and I is coming to its last page and whatever happens in the next chapter of my story will have no place for you. I’m on a journey but physically and emotionally and our paths won’t intertwine anymore. I feel like I can breathe again. I won’t be paralyzed by you anymore. It will take self-control and willpower but I won’t wave from this choice to let go of you and my love. I’m going to let time heal me and bring someone into my life that will teach me what it means to be loved, to be adored, to be appreciated, to be…
I was afraid to let go of you because you are the only love I know. I was afraid to lose that, to lose who you are to me. Afraid I’ll never find love again, but I know I have to let you go in order for my heart to be open to love again. A truer and deeper love. A mutual one. There is someone out there for me. Somewhere in this world he is living his life and one day when life deems it right we’ll meet. There is someone who is going to adore my quirky self. Who is going to lay next to me, and not want to be anywhere else. He’s going to be there for me during the good, bad, messy, and great times life brings our way. We’ll walk hand in hand through it all, and make it down each road together. He’ll be my best friend, my biggest fan, my lover, my everything, and I’ll be his. I won’t have to chase after him. He’ll look right at me and I’ll know I’m his and he’s mine. We’ll sit together and have conversations that will be the best parts of my days. We’ll make each other live better, enjoy more, be happy. We’ll support, challenge, comfort, and love each other. We’ll be what you and I never were.
This is the last time I’m say thank you. Thank you for filling my memories with happiness. Thank yo for bringing sunshine into my life. Thank you for being my first love. Thank you for teaching me I can overcome the pain, misery, and loneliness of a broken heart. I credit myself and the people around me for getting through that pain. Thank you for being the first love I opened my heart to. Thank yo for your friendship, no matter how fleeting it was.
Now it is time to say goodbye. Goodbye my love. There is so much to say but the words seem unnecessary now. This chapter of you and I comes to an end. This is the way it should be, so no tears, no sad smiles, just goodbye my first love.

Goodbye,
Me :)

Courtesy: smilesaregolden

(Source: lovequotesrus)